She was created to respond to being pursued, and with gentleness and patience, when given consistent and persistent strength in staying the course to giving her a safe place to come out from hiding, we are in-time met with her affection and adoration we could never hope to match
Some combined excerpts from "part 1" article:
"I have been able to watch many of my close friends with their significant others . . . spouses, fiancés, girlfriends . . . and one thing I have found time and time again.
They are all helpless in how their lovely Beauty has captivated them . . .
The only thing we must be careful about is forgetting that once awoken place in our passionate pursuit to have her at the beginning but how it may have become compromised along our journey with her.
Sometimes it takes more work to fight for keeping that flame blazing strong.
In all she offers us, what she desires in return is to be pursued . . . But what is pursuit?"
There is something in her design desiring to be pursued, wanted, and sought after, but what does that look like exactly for us as the ones who are the pursuers?
Let's begin exploring a bit of what it may mean to pursue . . .
The Young Woman
"Don't stare at me because I am dark-- the sun has darkened my skin. My brothers were angry with me; they forced me to care for their vineyards, so I couldn't care for myself-- my own vineyard."
-verse 6, Chapter 1
She doesn't see what you see.
Many times the daughters of Eve do not see their own beauty.
She isn't captivated by herself nor is she captivating to herself. This I'm afraid is a one-way street gentleman. She simply does not see what you see as you are looking at what has captivated you about her.
She only sees an image of herself she has developed over time, with the building materials containing both truth and lies.
With the lies come pain, and with the pain comes defenses. She may have had to live most of her life building up walls in an attempt to avoid repeats of what has already harmed her in the first place. She may have become so used to living this way she most likely doesn't even realize she is hiding parts of herself.
For us, the one who desires her to come out of hiding, it is important to remember she doesn't see what we see.
We see beauty in the brokenness as God does with us. We see beyond how pain has caused her to hide to her heart which becomes a treasure to us worth fighting to not only protect but also draw out.
As the pursuers, we are meant to ensure a safe place for her to come out from hiding, to woo her gently and, over time, this proves our love is true. It proves our love towards her is not set on ourselves but set on her.
In the places where she has been mistreated, we get to be the ones to set that right and treat her as she always desired to be treated.
Where she has built walls around tender places she has learned to protect, we get to be the one to offer a safe place of healing and restoration as we receive God's love to give to her. This is the strength we offer her . . . this is the love sacrifice we offer without demanding anything in return.
No, she doesn't see what we see when we see our Beauty, but over time, the truth of who God made her to be will win, allowing her to come out from hiding.
The Young Man
"My dove is hiding behind the rocks, behind an outcrop on the cliff. Let me see your face; let me hear your voice. For your voice is pleasant, and your face is lovely."
-verse 14, Chapter 2
We desire to have all of who she is, yet she hides. This is where the pursuit starts . . . and this is also where the pursuit must continue down the line in a more matured relationship. We can never stop pursuing her heart, for there are always going to be places where she retreats.
We desire to have her come out from hiding.
This was our original design as God created us. We were not originally created to hide. We were meant to be fully exposed unashamedly and without remorse. We were meant to be fully known.
He created us to live naked inside and out. After the fall however everything changed.
So it is no surprise that we desire that same thing when we look to pursue a woman's heart.
I am speaking of her hiding her heart and who she truly is from us and the world.
Because she doesn't see what we see, she does not believe she has anything worth looking at in the first place. So, she hides herself, unsure of what we will think and afraid she will not be enough.
The daughters of Eve fear abandonment and if they show who they are they risk not being enough to any pursuer. So a woman hides parts of herself like someone would clean their home before guests arrive, only allowing what "good" things the host would deem acceptable to the guests.
There is a currency in the pursuit that cannot be skipped or avoided.
It will take time.
The Young Woman-
"Before the dawn breezes blow and the night shadows flee, return to me, my love, like a gazelle or a young stag on the rugged mountains."
-verse 17, Chapter 2
What would be the point in sacrifice and perseverance without its rewards?
If it pleases our Father and He desires us to be with the woman we pursue, it will not be in vain. Whether it is a new relationship or in a marriage of twenty plus years, there are few things here on earth that fulfill like winning over the affection of our Beauty. Though she must be the one to choose us, she is not alone in getting to that place. A woman will not give over such a treasure as her love so quickly or easily.
She is radiant like a flower coming into full bloom, growing into revealing what ravishing colors lie within her in wait for the one who wins her heart.
She was created to respond to being pursued, and with gentleness and patience, when given consistent and persistent strength in staying the course to giving her a safe place to come out from hiding, we are in-time met with her affection and adoration we could never hope to match.
This is the great reward for giving ourselves and sacrificing what we may want when we want it for something far greater than having her fall in love with us.
It means allowing her heart to come alive and free in places where she may have been a captive to her own wounds. The bigger picture means being a part of her becoming the woman God created her to become. He will use us to speak truth and fight for her heart in ways she simply could not herself.
What an incredible picture this portrays in how God pursues us. To think we have the honor to be a reflection of that towards the woman He desires us to pursue is one of the greatest honors we could ever hope to carry.
This means we get to be a living representation of Jesus' passionate and relentless pursuit of His beloved treasure, His bride . . . His church.
To find an even deeper understanding of the feminine heart, we must actually look to a picture painted by our Creator in the most unlikely of places.
Men . . . we must look to ourselves.
(Scripture found in Song of Solomon)
