Nothing good comes from me carrying a “God” load that only our Father can
I’m always wanting more.
And I fear that it takes away from what I already have.
At least, I know it can.
It can cause my eyes to wonder too far from where I am . . . from what I have.
It can cause me to not be present in the moments that matter because I am focused elsewhere.
And I’ve found that it leaves me not truly appreciating all God has given me and where He has already taken me because I am so bent on where I’m going next or what I will obtain next.
This is the question that haunts me typically:
“Is it enough?”
If I was honest . . . really honest, I would say it’s not enough, for, I am always wanting more.
There is some good that comes from this I suppose.
Wanting to be better as I grow and learn more of what I can in any situation or circumstance is a good thing.
Wanting to excel more at what I do and not settle for what so many others around me settle for, which is always less than what they are capable of, is a good thing as well.
Surely there is good that comes from those desires and not being content with where I am or what I have in that sense.
But, like with everything in this world, there is a dark side where the light does not shine.
This desire can cross a line where I would honestly admit it ceases to be “good” and becomes a way I may fail.
I tend to weave in and out of the two.
The only way to know the difference is simple:
“God, what do You say about it?”
“What do You think?”
Novel idea, I know . . . but how often do I actually ask Him which is which?
I can’t think of another approach that would actually make a difference but I don’t ask Him as much as I should.
Regardless, God has to be the one to tell me, “That is enough . . .” or “You have all you need.”
He has to be the one to tell me that I have all I have for a reason and a purpose and need nothing more . . . or not.
He has to be the one to tell me, “That’s not enough, son. Do more . . . become more. I’ll help you.”
Left to myself, I will usually take the easier way out.
Whether it’s thinking I’m not enough and or I don’t have enough of what I think I need, the only truth to either one God alone knows.
Burning myself out from trying to always “be better” . . . I will become lost in my search if I don’t have the answer to this question “Is it enough?“
I will say this . . . there is no greater peace than knowing which is which.
When God is the One answering that question, it is with total finality and it feels good to have a direction.
A man can get lost without direction.
When He tells me, “You have all you need and you are right where you’re suppose to be,” I believe and trust Him.
When He tells me, “You can do better. I know it’s a lot more work but you can do better,” I believe that too and trust Him.
It actually takes the pressure away from every possible failure or success being on my shoulders alone.
Nothing good comes from me carrying a “God” load that only our Father can.
I don’t want to miss where I am right now because I am thinking about where I’m not or what I don’t have.
I don’t want to take for granted all God has given me because I’m so caught up in focused on what I think I need that I don’t have.
I want to humbly submit as a man to my God-given portion, whatever that may be.
To humbly learn and grow when I need to or humbly receive what more is given when it is time.
Only our Father knows one from the other . . . so let us ask Him which is which.
