There seems to be a heaviness to our souls that demands attention and lets us know when we have, for far too long, neglected them
Sometimes I wake up and don’t know what to do with myself. Because my schedule through out the week is not a typical “nine-to-five & off-on-weekends” type of situation, each new day can be very different than the previous.
It’s easier actually when I have a meeting to be at or something pressing that needs attention soon after I wash up and get ready for the day.
But, what about when I wake up and there isn’t anything I necessarily have to do or need to get working on until later in the day? The thought of that will at times send me into an embarrassingly what seems to be short-lived panic.
If I don’t have a significant someone in my life to text “good morning” to . . . or a place to be at a certain time . . . or someone telling me what to do and when it needs to be completed by . . . when I am left with only me and God, at least for a moment, it seems like I am suddenly lost.
In my soul I feel something that can’t be explained away by mere boredom or simply not knowing what to fill my time with.
It is much deeper than that.
There seems to be a heaviness to our souls that demands attention and lets us know when we have, for far too long, neglected them.
In fact, I think it is some strange depth in awareness to each passing moment knowing I will never get them back as they never stop rushing by like a fast moving river against my legs.
So, I feel something like pressure mounting upon my early states of thought processes as I am more vulnerable waking up at the beginning of the day before anything has really happened or started.
The best way I can think to describe it is left-overs from unprocessed experiences and emotions that linger in our hearts if not given attention to.
In those moments, I always have a choice to make.
Do I take that "lost" feeling to God, or do I pacify it by distracting myself with things that instantly take my mind off of it?
Whether we realize it or not, for this reason, I think most of us have a “morning routine” or something similar because it gives us some sense of structure or order to what could seem like an overwhelming sea of choices to take on a day we really have no idea what to expect from it.
One of my closest friends showers every morning before he begins any day.
I have known many people to blast music on the drive to school or work, a sort of mindless attempt to prolong not fully waking up until they have to.
Another buddy of mine heads straight for a computer or TV screen to catch up on some current events in the world when he is waking up.
My Dad has had to recently start stretching each morning because his back would give him so much trouble. Now it is a daily routine, giving him a constant “normal” in a life that can at times seem to be unpredictably not.
I remember talking to a buddy who shares a common routine with me in spending more time than most making coffee. We talked about how it does indeed give us a very small yet significant source of accomplishment first thing before our day starts.
It’s a routine now for me to wake up, brush my teeth and wash my face . . . go down stairs and because I am usually pretty significantly dehydrated, drink lots of water while my goose-necked kettle heats up to pour over my beloved coffee grounds.
Sure it is a small thing but I would be fooling no one if I said I didn’t rely on that every day for some tiny result of getting me past the first 30-45 minutes of each day.
What is your morning routine?
So, is it wrong?
I don’t think it is any more wrong than my Dad stretching each morning or my buddy jumping in the shower.
Is it necessary?
I think it is or else so many of us would not have some similar routine each day that we undoubtedly rely on to get us through the beginnings of it.
God never asks us to not be human, at least not here on this side of heaven. I could be wrong but I also don’t think He wants to micro-manage our habitual daily routines like some CEO wanting his company to run more efficiently. He doesn’t look at our lives as a means to make a profit, so He isn’t worried about the small amounts of our day that aren’t necessarily reasonable or logically productive.
Could I make coffee each day in a quicker and more efficient way? Sure I could . . . In fact it would be much easier and much quicker to not make a pour-over coffee and just use the dang Kureg.
Does my buddy need a shower every morning?
No, probably not considering he takes one the night before and when he does in the morning, he usually just stands in there for a while letting the hot water help to wake him up.
Does my other friend need to stay caught up on current events in the world to make it through the day? No, I really don’t think it is necessary considering he teaches music for a living and also plays piano for his church.
It is simply a part of being human to have not only routine habits, but to also rely on them in a symbiotic type of dependance.
I can tend to be really hard on others around me in terms of pushing them to be better and helping them to see their potential.
It has served me well as I have fought for those around me who need encouragement and maybe just someone to give them a bit of an uncomfortable change in perspective they may not see on their own.
But I can also see how I have pushed a little too hard at times and caused some pain I never intended to inflict simply because I prematurely wanted them to be farther along than they currently were.
Time is such a powerful part of our lives.
It dictates so much . . . at least more than we want to admit.
Sometimes there is no getting around time . . . and taking time out of the equation means destroying any possibility of change or true growth.
In the same way you can’t rush the beauty of a seed sprouting from the ground, we cannot rush our lives moving and turning into what God wants them to become.
Again, He doesn’t look at our lives with the mentality of “time-is-money.”
And if God Himself cannot and won’t rush something that needs time, what right do I have to even attempt to?
I say this because what I have noticed is, while I do this to others, yes, I more importantly do this to myself.
I say more importantly because it actually all starts with how we are with ourselves.
I have heard it said this way:
How you treat yourself is how you will treat others.
God says it this way . . .
“ . . . Love your neighbor as yourself”
-Mathew 12:31
So, do you think God is not okay with us loving ourselves? And what does that look like?
Here is an example.
Because my Mom has seen how hard I can be on myself, she often reminds me to be patient with myself. She often reminds me to give myself time and to not rush the things in my life . . . to not put so much pressure on everything to be perfect or to turn out what I would deem “right.”
She is basically saying, “Chris, you’re not exactly loving yourself very well expecting so much from yourself and it is going to hinder how you love others.”
Most importantly, it will effect how I allow God to love me.
If I think I am not good enough, I will stiff-arm God from thinking I amgood enough . . . so the cycle continues viciously coming back around to the same thing . . . looking at time as the enemy.
No wonder sometimes I wake up and feel so much pressure on myself?
If perfection is all I am wanting, I won’t ever start anything.
And so it goes . . .
That God is very patient towards us so much so that He waits for us to get some silly small things out of our system in order to walk with us each day.
He is not the one who is being hard on us and if He does want change, it will happen over time and not in a single moment.
As we are taking steps with Him while following His lead to the best of our abilities, He is okay where we are right now because He knows we are not going to stay there.
He knows the plans He has for us and He knows it is exceptionally necessary for time to be factored into the equation of our journey with Him.
He will not rush us ahead because it would destroy us.
So He allows us to be human . . . to have our daily quirks and routines and whatever else helps to get us through the day.
Here is the most important part so don’t miss this.
All He wants, more than anything else, is to be invited into it all.
Have we forgotten and lost track of why we were created?
Either we are each little corporations and God is the CEO or we are His children who He wants to spend time and walk out each day with.
Again, when He wants us to change and to grow, it won’t be in a single moment of robotic commands that send instant results. I have heard it said that if you want instant results, go to McDonalds.
If you want God’s results, walk out each day with Him and over time, like a tree planted along the river, you will grow fruit in each season prospering in all you do.
He is the river. We are the tree nourished by His flow.
Keep the morning routine.
Just make sure to invite Him in it.
“And he will be like a tree firmly planted [and fed] by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season; Its leaves never wither; And in whatever he does, he prospers [and comes to maturity].”
-Psalm 1:3
(Photo: the first one was taken in Yellowstone)
